Churches Need an Effective Marriage Ministry – Part 2

There are several ways to strengthen marriages within the church through having an effective marriage ministry. A marriage ministry can be challenging and at times requires those involved to be transparent in their own marriage – some well known figures in the history of the church have struggled and even ‘feared’ preaching on marriage for the work that it would cause, but they pressed forward to do so. In all areas we need to ensure that we speak in love and our words are based on the Holy Bible, Kingdom principles despite being against the standards and principles of the world about us.

A strong and fruitful marriage ministry needs to be founded on the basis that “marriage and the health of marriages are a high priority throughout the church leadership, the pastoral staff (volunteers) and their spouses; also an intrinsic part of the structure of all of the church.”

The following are some of the strategic steps to be taken to start a sustainable marriage ministry within a church. As we have said elsewhere strong, healthy, Christ centred marriages in the church will be for the good of families, the church and its immediate community – world changers.

Strategic Steps for Starting a Strong, Effective Marriage Ministry

Initial Steps

1. Seek the Lord’s direction and protection through prayer – this needs to be upheld throughout the establishment and running of the ministry.
2. If you are not the church leader, then set out a basic vision and seek a meeting with the church leader.
3. Assuming that necessary approval/endorsement is in place then the vision, through the church leader, is given to the church council/management body underlining its priority amongst all (see above). At this time give an approximate timetable for a starting date. Along the way reporting progress made to the church council/management body and where appropriate to church members.
4. Prayerfully seek out two or three others who have a strong marriage to be part of the initial marriage ministry team.

Essential Components to be Included in Building a Marriage Ministry

• Have a booklist of Christian books on marriage always available for members to take – Marriage Australia’s list is available here for your download and printing. 
• Prayer ~ We all need to pray for marriage’s – for the marriages of the nation’s leaders (Federal/State/Territory), for  church leadership where they are married. Keep intercessory prayer groups and home groups aware of needs.
  • Encourage regular prayer for marriage and marriages in the church, the local community and our country. We publish a monthly outline, to this web-site, of suggested areas of prayer which cover a different sphere of our nation.
  • We always crying out in unity to God for our nation’s marriages and for sexual purity.
  • Particularly encourage married couples to pray together for their own marriage. We recently published “Prayer Guide For Your Marriage” this is available for download here >> . Download and print a few copies for distribution.
• Identify a Christian couples/relationship counsellor who believes that reconciliation is the primary route and have a supply of their cards readily available. There are an increasing number of Christian counsellors who offer online services to couples using the Zoom platform or similar, this can help with overcoming travelling difficulties and/or embarrassment etc. To find Christian counsellors in your region see Christian Counsellors Association (CCAA) web site.
• Insist on Pre-marriage training is undertaken prior to marriage in the church. This can be done through either Prepare/Enrich (secular, protestant and catholic alternative) or Foccus (catholic, protestant and secular alternatives)  – both can only be run by trained facilitators online options available for both; or a course such as The Pre-Marriage Course.
• Periodic use of:
  • The Marriage Course (7 sessions) produced through Alpha of Holy Trinity, Brompton, UK
  • or “The Visionary Marriage” produced by Dr. Rob and Amy Rienow (Visionary Family Ministries) This is a course of 5 Bible-driven video sessions that focus on the biblical foundation for marriage, communication, sexuality, and conflict resolution, and provides…….  The resources required are by digital download. Check out the details etc through this link >>
• Marriage Seminar or Weekend Retreat:
  • – Power to Change (part of the CRU International network) can help here 
  • or Growing Together in Marriage South Australia. These are weekend retreats held at Abbotsford Country House in Lyndoch, Barossa Valley. Look out their website for future retreats >>
  • or  2=1 Australia  hold various courses/retreats across Australia, for current detail see their website  >>
• Small groups with focus on marriage in Bible studies, discussion or watching a video or listening to a podcast that is directed in a particular area eg covenant, dealing with anger etc followed by discussion.
• Encourage  married couples to invest in their marriage by joining the Marriage Investment Bank. Since the Bank was founded in 2011 hundreds of couples across Australia and  other nations have joined in this fun way to invest in their marriage throughout the year. There are no fees involved and high returns can be expected and privacy is maintained. Find out more about the Marriage Investment Bank  >>
• Encouraging married couples to put aside time for a “Date” see our Dating Your Spouse page and “Baby Sitting Gift Certificates“
• Host an annual Date Night at the end of Marriage Week, this could be styled as a “Wedding Feast” (Rev 19:6-9 ) then all people of the church can be involved – married, single, to be married, divorced go to this page

All these will lay a strong foundation to build stronger healthier marriages within a church however there is more that can be done to build a powerful, effective marriage ministry.

Going to the Next Level

Having launched the marriage ministry with some/all the above components seek also to include the following in the churches DNA, and church members will come to appreciate the importance of marriage and the importance of the marriage to God.

• Occasional interviews with church member couples who can give testimony:
  • on overcoming marital or family difficulties and how God guided and sustained them
  • giving praise to God for what He has done in their years of marriage
• Church leaders, church council or board members and together with their spouses to speak and be authentic and vulnerable in their own marriages.
• Regularly give a marriage tip in church news whether its video, printed or spoken.
• Give a sermon series on marriage – what marriage is, covenant, communication, dealing with anger etc much within such a series is also equipping the whole congregation for their ministry/lives.
• Seek to establish a marriage ministry team, from church members, who could initially focus on the role of mentoring others, note this is mentoring not counselling. Such a team, should wherever possible reflect the diversity/demographics of church membership.   Some books on mentoring are listed in our book list . Training is available through:
  • online through Drs Les & Leslie Parrot or directly through their Marriage Mentoring Academy their books are available through Christian book stores etc.
  • Power to Change enquiries through this link >>

Promoting Your Churches Marriage Ministry

It is worth promoting the events and special occasions that you arrange within the marriage ministry of your church. In Australia and around the world it is still found that people, who are not normally church people, will come to marriage enrichment courses/seminars/ retreats as well as a sermon series on marriage according to Gods’ word.

Word of mouth has always been good advertising so make sure these items are featured well in advance in your church news whether spoken, video or other media. Then there is your website and social media making sure that contact details are up to date. Finally do not forget to keep your local Christian broadcaster in the loop whether or not they have a noticeboard.